as I had some time last week, I cooked one of my most favorite recipes. I call it a curry, but as I have created the recipe on my own and as I never have cooked a real curry, I can not say if it is one. But at least I can say that it is very tasty.
Homemade Curry (4 big portions)
Preparation time: 1 hour
Ingredients
250 g of rice (Basmati or Jasmine)
500 g of mushrooms
200 g of coconut milk
220 g of chickpeas
1 zucchini
1 paprika
3 carrots
2 tomatoes
1 chili
1 ginger
2 garlic cloves
2 onions
2 spring onions
Olive oil
Salt, pepper, turmeric, herbs of Provence, curry, hot paprika
Heat salted water, then cook the rice for around 10 minutes. While the rice is cooking, start preparing the vegetables by cutting the carrots, the zucchini, and the paprika into pieces. I always put the vegetables in the same bowl where I will put the rest of the food after eating to save dishes (student life without a dishwasher ;)).
Cut the onions, spring onions, and the chili into small pieces. Pay attention that you only cut the white part of the spring onions, while you keep the green part for later. Put some olive oil into a pan, add the onions, and shortly afterwards the chili. When the onions are transparent, add the vegetables you already prepared.
While the vegetables cook, wash the mushrooms and cut them into slides. Add them to the pan. Then cut the tomatoes, the green of the spring onions, the garlic, and the ginger. When the vegetables are well done, add the garlic, the ginger, the chickpeas, the tomatoes, the green of the spring onions, and the coconut milk. I use a lot of spices such as turmeric, curry, and paprika, which gives the meal a slightly spicy taste. The rest of the spices round the dish perfectly off. Just let everything cook for some minutes, then you can serve it with the rice.
The recipe does take an hour for preparation, but the result is a healthy and tasty meal that lasts several days.
Please leave a comment if you liked the recipe, or if you have any additional ideas or any remarks. Bon appetit!
and welcome to the second part of my blog post about my vacation at home in Kempten, Bavaria. As we spent the first week visiting cities, playing games, and bouldering, we decided to hike some more in the second part of our vacation.
On Monday (09.07.) we visited Isny and Wangen, to see some small cities in the region of Kempten. Isny is a very small place with nice stores. After visiting the shops, we ate Asian food from a small Vietnamese shop called Hung & Khang. They prepare their food fresh and it is very tasty. At the moment, because of Corona, they only offer take-away. If it is not too cold, you can get it and eat it next to the pound, 3 minutes from the store. The parking is free in Isny, while you have to pay for it in Wangen. Wangen is a little bit bigger, but also very nice. I think the houses are even more beautiful than in Isny. We drank Cappuccino at the Fideslisbäck while sitting in the sun. The coffee is very good and you can get small things to eat, like salads or sandwiches, if you are hungry. As we were in the mood to walk in nature, we decided to walk along a river near Wangen. The hike actually ended more in an adventure than planned, as we once took the wrong path. We started climbing a small mountain which made us lose time. The path was steep at some points, with ropes to help you mount it. As we started our hike near 4 o’clock, and the sun went down at 8, while the hike takes more than three hours, we had no time for detours. Being in the dark in the forest is not very funny. One more wrong path and we would have been lost in the woods in the dark, with no battery left on the phone. Happily, we were lucky and took the right paths to go back to the car. We arrived right before it was dark.
As we decided to use the rest of our time to hike and see nature, we went to Baad (Austria) on Tuesday (09.08.). Actually, we only realized that Baad is in Austria when we passed the border. The hike we chose takes around three hours and offers incredible views on the Kleinwalsertal. We mounted a mountain until we arrived at the Stierhofalpe, where we ate regional food and drank fresh milk. They offer fresh cheese and sausages from their cows and homemade cake. Do not expect real meals, as there are none. But, you have a beautiful view from there, plus horses and cows walking free. The whole trip was not too tiring, while I recommend the Kleinwalsertal, which is truly beautiful and a must-see.
As we enjoyed the market so much (see part one of the blog post), we went back to eat Weißwurst and Brezel again on Wednesday (09.09.). After the unexpected hike on Monday, we wanted to experience some more adventure by trying a via Ferrata (Klettersteig). We found a Klettersteig near Garmisch Partenkirchen, which was described as easy and adequate for beginners. Furthermore, you do not need special equipment and there is another way down. Sounds perfect! We just bought some walking boots for Julia, as they are necessary for hikes. As the hike starts in Ettal, you can start by visiting the monastery of Ettal, which is astounding and for free. After the visit, we started our hike to experience our first Klettersteig. How exciting! Well, the hike was exhausting, even if it lasted only for two hours. Then the surprise: the via Ferrata was not what we imagined. We thought that it is a very small path next to the edge with a rope to secure yourself. Like the trail, we used on Monday. In reality, it was a steep stone, you had to climb up. As we knew there will be another path down, we still decided to mount. I mean, we went through two hours of exhausting hiking just to experience a Klettersteig. While mounting we met a couple which was secured by climbing equipment and had problems to decent, as the girl was scared. I said: well we will definitively take the other way down. The girl answered: what another way? Julia and me panicking. The couple then said that they did not take a good look, so maybe they did not see the other path. Also, they mentioned that the view is worth it. As we were already near to the top, Julia and I decided to continue and to hope that there really is another path. When I arrived at the top, Julia (which was behind me) asked if we are gonna die. I answered yes, duck, and sat down on the ground. I have to admit that the view was the best one I have ever had. The problem was, that both Julia and I are a little bit scared of heights. Ok, maybe a little is an understatement. As the surface of the top of the mountain was not very large, we both just sat there and tried not to panic. It was difficult to enjoy the view. Also, we realized that we really have to go back all the way down, with only a rope to secure us. Right above the edge with a height of 1633 m. Not very reassuring. We spent some time on top, trying to calm down and prepare for the descent. At least I took some pictures, trying to make the trip worth it. Happily, we made it safe and sound back to the ground. What an experience! And maybe not only our first but also our last Klettersteig.
After the adrenaline of feeling as if we were gonna die on Wednesday, we decided on an easier hike on Thursday (09.10.). Therefore, we went to the castle Neuschwanstein to walk around the lake. The hike was very beautiful and less tiring than the hike of the Ettaler Mandl, even if our legs still burned from the day before. There are some small paths next to the edge, but nothing dangerous. You should still wear hiking boots to have a good grip. While hiking, you pass several nice spots and have most of the time a great view of the castles and the lake. As the castles are next to Füssen, we went there afterwards to visit the city. While the parking at the castles was very expensive (8 euros), you can park for free in Füssen in the evening. The streets are very beautiful, especially at night. As we ate nothing since the morning, we went to an Italian restaurant called La Perla for dinner. The food was incredibly good and the servant was funny and polite. We shared two meals and had a Tiramisu for dessert. The Tiramisu is the only thing I can not recommend, as it was not as good as the main courses. If you are not a fan of Italian food, there are many well-rated restaurants in Füssen. Therefore, if you are in the region you should really visit the castles and Füssen.
After all the hiking we were tired on Friday (09.11.). We just went to the Hopfensee near Füssen. It is a very clean and small lake, where you can go for a swim. As we were so tired, we just played Carcassonne and relaxed on the grass next to the water.
Well, we became big fans of the Weißwurst breakfast on the market, so we went back there on Saturday (09.12.). Right next to the coffee stand is a bakery stand, where you can buy fresh cake and bread. We bought two pieces of cake, which were very tasty. After the market, we left for a quick hike around Oberstdorf, which is only 30 minutes away. The city is bigger than, for example, Kempten and offers many shops and restaurants. The mountains around Oberstdorf are high and beautiful, with many hikes to discover. It is a great choice if you do not want to drive until Austria to hike. In the evening a streetfood festival started in Kempten. We tried multiple dishes such as buffalo burger, potatoes chips, and pulled beef. The burger was with meat and mozzarella from buffalo and was different than other burgers. Normally I am not a big fan of burgers, but this one was just incredible. Maybe you try it one day, it is worth it.
At first, we wanted to go to a lake for a swim on Sunday (09.13.), as it was a hot and sunny day. As we were not in the mood, we first went bouldering in the morning and then went back to the street food market in Kempten. We again ate a buffalo burger and potato chips, as they have been so good. Then our trip was at the end and we went back to Stuttgart.
So, now you know how we spent our two week holiday at Kempten. The time was amazing, also as I have not spent as much time with my best friend since 2014. When you are older, you just do not have as much time as when you are still at school. We enjoyed the time and the region of the Allgäu. There is a lot to do, so it never gets tiring. There are endless mountains to mount, cities to visit, restaurants to try, and cows to stroke. Even when it is rainy, you can go for a walk, visit a city and go shopping, go bouldering or at a therme to relax. Maybe I will see you one day here. I am already sad that I will leave in February (suspense), but I am definitively coming back!
and welcome to my second recipe. As I still have coconut milk left from the pumpkin soup, I decided to make a mushroom sauce with it. I hope you like it.
Coconut Mushroom Sauce (2 portions)
Ingredients
500g mushroom
1 tbsp coconut milk
2 hands of vegan parmesan
1 garlic clove
1 onion
Olive oil
8 tbsp of broth
1/2 bunch parsley
First, wash the mushroom and cut it into slides. Then cut the onion into small pieces and put it with olive oil into a pan. When the onion is transparent, add the mushroom and cook the vegetables until they are tender. Then add the broth, coconut milk, and garlic. I always cut the garlic into small pieces, then crush them with the knife so that the taste is stronger. While the sauce is still cooking, cut the parsley. Then you can add the parsley and the parmesan to the sauce.
If you do not find vegan parmesan you can also cook without it, it is still delicious. 🙂 You can eat it with pasta, rice, or as I did with bread dumplings (Semmelknödel). I bought spinach dumplings from Aldi and cooked them before preparing the sauce. Then I used the water of the dumplings as water for the sauce. The sauce is made within 30 minutes and is sufficient for two people.
Please leave a comment if you liked the recipe, or if you have any additional ideas or any remarks. Bon appetit!
today I wanted to share my latest recipe with you. As it was rainy and cold, I was in the mood for a bowl of soup. I just used the ingredients that I had, which produced a pumpkin soup. The preparation takes less than an hour, and the soup is a little bit spicy and very creamy. I liked it a lot.
Pumpkin Soup for two People (four tall plates)
Ingredients
1/2 Butternut Squash
1 Onion
1 Garlic Clove
1 Potato
2 Carrots
1 Pepperoni
1 Ginger
0,5l of Broth
3 tbsp. of Coconut Milk
Pepper, Salt, and Muscat
Oil (I used olive oil)
You first cut the onion, the pepperoni, the ginger, and the garlic into small pieces. The potato, carrot, and pumpkin have to be cut into cubes. The smaller the cubes, the faster they are finished cooking. I normally cut them into something like 2 cm x 2 cm cubes.
Then you put a little bit of oil in a pan and add the onion. When the onion is transparent, you add the pepperoni. Shortly afterwards you can add the rest of the vegetables. Sweat the vegetables for some minutes while stirring, then add the broth and the coconut milk. I used coconut milk instead of cream so that the soup is light and vegan. Cook the soup for around 20 minutes on medium heat. The soup is ready when you can cut the carrots and potatoes easily with a spoon. At last, you have to smush the soup with a pureeing device. Voilà, the soup is ready to be eaten! The soup goes well with fresh bread, pumpkin seed oil, and pumpkin seeds.
Have fun trying the recipe and bon appetit. 🙂 I am happy about your feedback, as this is a recipe I created on my own.
Love, Eileen
PS: You can keep the seeds, wash them, and then roast them with cinnamon and sugar in a pan. Makes a very tasty snack or dessert.
as I have been on vacation for several weeks, I was not able to write a new blog post until now. Normally I would have spent the last two weeks on a road trip with my best friend Julia. We wanted to travel through Europe, maybe to the south of France or throw Italy. Sadly the van of her dad, which we wanted to use for the tour, broke one week before our trip. Also, more regions were declared as risk regions due to Covid-19. That is why we decided to spend our vacation at my place in Kempten, Bavaria (Germany). In this blog post, I will show you how we spent our two weeks. Maybe you get inspired to travel to the Allgäu, too. Especially if you can not travel far this year and you want to stay in Germany, here are some insights into what we did. I split the blog post into two parts, as I give a quick summary of each day with some tips of mine. Without splitting, the blog post would have been way too long. 🙂 In this blog post, I talk about the first week, while part two will be published in two weeks.
We arrived in Kempten on Monday, the 31st of August. As we arrived later that evening, we only went to the store to buy supplies and cooked a mushroom ragout with bread dumplings (Semmelknödel), a specialty in Bavaria. You can buy them, for example, at Aldi for a small price. They are not too bad when you add a nice sauce.
It was very rainy on Tuesday (09.01.), so we stayed at home. We only tried to visit the downtown for around 30 minutes, which was enough to get us soaked with water. We spent the day playing games like Carcassonne and Qwixx, which are very funny even when you play them with only two people. Especially Carcassone was our favorite, which is why we played it like 3 times per day. In the evening we went bouldering in the Swoboda Alpin at Kempten, which is a good thing to do when it is raining. To finish the evening right, we went to Orange Octopus to get a party pizza. If you go there to get it, you only pay 14 euros for a party pizza, which is a great deal. Also, it tastes soooooo good!
As the market in Kempten takes place on Wednesdays and Saturdays we decided to visit Kempten on this day (09.02.) by starting with the market. You can buy very good meat and sausages from a stand which only sells organic products. The price is more expensive but it is worth the taste and high quality. I recommend Bauernwurst and Knoblauchwurst. We also bought some olives and cream cheese called Schwiegermutterkäse with Fladenbrot for our lunch and strolled along the streets of Kempten. There are many shops to visit, surrounded by beautiful houses and streets. The next place we visited is called Burghalde and is something like the ruins of a castle. It only takes some minutes to mount to the top, where you have a view of the city and the mountains. The last place we discovered was the Cambodunum. In fact, Kempten is declared as the oldest city in Germany. The Cambodunum park includes ruins from gothic times and a museum of a therme, which we did not visit because of the high price (4 euros for a small museum). As it was a beautiful day, we decided to eat in the park of Kempten, where you have a nice view and benches to sit on. We took some coffee, the cream cheese, Fladenbrot, and the olives and had some nice picnic. We finished the day with ice cream and again some games.
To do something more exciting, we went to the Alpsee Bergwelt near to the large Alpsee on Thursday (09.03.). For 32 euros, it is possible to take a ride to the top of the mountain, go to the climbing park for three hours and go back down by coaster or by chairlift. We fought our fear of heights in the climbing park and had a great view while descending with the coaster. It is the longest coaster in Germany! Just so you know, when you are using the coaster in the afternoon in summer, you have to wait up until one and a half hours. We think that it is worth it. If you get hungry, you can reach a nice Alm within 10 minutes. The food is regional and very tasty for an adequate price. Also, you can take beautiful hikes around there. Next to the climbing park is a playground for children and there are many cute alpacas. Therefore, Alpsee Bergwelt is a nice trip for everyone.
View while mounting to the Alm
The Alm
Maybe you already heard of Lindau, a very beautiful city at the Bodensee. As it takes only one hour to go there from Kempten, we spent Friday (09.04.) visiting the city and enjoying a boat tour on the lake. The boat tour starts right at the bus station and takes one and a half hours, for 15.80 euros. It was very nice to sit in the sun, watching the sea and the mountains around it from another view. If you go to Lindau by car, I advise you to park your car in a parking lot next to the city and take the bus. It costs 5 euros for the parking ticket, including a bus ticket for the day (up to 5 people). We parked our car at the (P+R) Blauwiese parking lot, as this is where the shuttle bus starts and as there is a WC.
On the morning of Saturday (09.05.), we went back to the market in Kempten to eat Weißwurst and Brezel as breakfast. This is a traditional food in Bavaria. Also, there is a stand with fresh coffee such as Cappuccino and Latte Macchiato next to the church. They offer normal milk and oat milk, in case you do not drink cow’s milk. To enjoy the sunny weather, we went back to the large Alpsee after breakfast. This time we went for a swim and again played Carcassone, our favorite game. The water is very clear and not too cold. You have a great view from the lake and you can either sit on a bench or lie on the grass. It is easy to get into the water, with no disgusting mud on the ground of the lake. I hate that muddy feeling you get in many small lakes. Also, there are small stands with fresh coffee, something to eat (like Käsespätzle), and Ice Cream. The only negative point is the missing toilets. In the evening we watched the movie Das schönste Mädchen der Welt, which was so good. If you like romantic films and rap music, I recommend this german movie!
As the weather was rainy again on Sunday (09.06.), we decided to play games and go bouldering again, like on Tuesday.
So that was the first week of our vacation in Kempten. I hope it gives you an idea of how to spend your holidays in the Allgäu. Feel free to click on the links to get further information if you want to visit the places yourself! If you have any questions or want some more insights, just write me a message. 🙂
I am sure that you know Tinder. The platform to meet new people, find dates, and maybe even love. One colleague of my best friend Julia, for example, met a woman on Tinder, and now they are married, expecting their first child, and have both a tattoo of the Tinder symbol on their bodies. Do you use Tinder or any similar dating platform such as Bumble or Lovoo? I used them a while ago. I even have been in a relationship for almost three years after meeting someone from Tinder. Now I am not interested anymore in using these kinds of apps and I will tell you the reasons for that in this blog post.
First of all, I do not have much time as I am studying and bouldering most of my time. Therefore, time is very precious to me. I want to spend my time with people I know and that I love or that are worth it. I do not know the people on Tinder or Bumble, so I do not know if they are worth my time. Maybe I will spend hours writing with some stranger just to find out that he is a jerk. I realized that I have no motivation to write people on such platforms as I prefer to spend my time with people I know. I also prefer to get to know people in real life. When I go bouldering I meet so many people. They are always friendly and we already have something in common: our passion for bouldering. So even when I downloaded Tinder just for fun some months ago, I did not have an interest in responding to any messages or in matching.
The second reason why I do not want to use Tinder anymore is that I am somehow too romantic. I know how that sounds and I am not believing in faith or something. But using Tinder to find a boyfriend just feels like dating people until the first „best one“ is found. I mean it is wonderful when you meet somebody great you are falling in love with. But I keep thinking that if you did not match with this person, it would have been someone else you would have liked the most. Maybe, maybe not. I have this strange belief that the more coincidental the existence of your relationship is, the more it is as if it should have been. So when there were many coincidental incidents necessary to meet your partner, I feel as if it had to be. I know that sounds like faith, but I just like this idea. So on Tinder, it was not coincidental that you met, but you were looking for someone, swiping right several times, chatting to several guys, and maybe even going out with several people until you chose the first person you liked the most. You can not know if it is the person you should be with. But then you do not know when you met in real life either. I do not believe that there is this one person that is made for you, but that there are multiple that could be right. I also do not believe that the right person has to be perfect, but that you should love this person with his/her faults and that you could live with him or her without changing anything. I think that you should not be with somebody if you want to change him/her from the beginning. People change if they want to, but you can not force them.
The third reason against using Tinder to meet somebody is that when you meet somebody in real life, you have a better story to tell. Imagine your grandparents asking where you met and your answer is Tinder?
Of course, there are positive arguments for such platforms. For example, when you are older, it is more difficult to meet someone. Many are already married and you might meet less new people than when you are still at school or university. It also helps when you move somewhere new. You can find new friends or even learn new languages. Also, if you are just looking to find someone for something loose, it is the perfect platform to do it.
Please do not think that I want to say that if you are in a relationship with somebody you met on Tinder means it is not the right person for you. It can be the perfect fit, as it was for the colleague of Julia. I just wanted to share my romantic point of view on this topic and the reasons why I, for example, do not use these platforms anymore (besides that I am in a relationship 😉 ). I am also very interested in your opinions so please feel free to leave comments.
and welcome to the shortest blog post I ever published. I just wanted to ask you if you have any regrets? Maybe you are ashamed of something? I think we all do have something we are not proud of. Maybe, you hurt somebody or did something stupid or embarrassing. I think that we should only do something when we know that we will not regret it. If you do something, stand by it. And if you did something wrong which you regret, learn from it. You can not change the past. The only thing you can do is to learn from what happened and do it better in the future. I know what I do and I know when I make mistakes. But I am not doing something carelessly. And I do not waste my time to regret, but rather to reflect so that I am sure what I want to do and who I want to be.
That’s all I wanted to say. Maybe you think about it. 🙂
as I am writing my exams at the moment, I didn’t have time to write a long blog post. But I thought that I will at least write a short one, so you don’t start missing me. 😉
Do you know that feeling that you are eager for something to arrive? Like Christmas, your birthday, or the next holidays? That feeling makes us happy and excited. But sometimes it’s not just that you can’t wait until the holidays arrive, but you also wish the days until then to pass faster. Maybe you experience a hard time at work or at school. Maybe the weather is very bad at the moment, so you can’t go for a swim although it’s July. Or maybe Corona annoys you as much as everyone. In times like these, I start to think: only two months left, then I will have my bachelor’s degree and the stress will be over. Only one month left and I will be lying on a beach in Italy. Only two days left and it’s the weekend. I am sure you can relate to some of those examples. The thing is, life is short. Furthermore, we sleep a third of it. So why should we spend our time hoping that time passes faster? Last year I thought about this and what would happen if I dropped dead tomorrow. I know that nothing would happen as I wouldn’t think anymore. But imagine that I would, then maybe I would see that I spend the last week of my life hoping that it will be over soon, working day and night. Frankly, I don’t want to spend half of my life, hoping that time passes faster, only waiting for the next pleasant day to arrive. That’s why I decided to make each day a pleasant day. Even when I have endless work to do, I try to do something that makes me happy. I try, for example, to take at least one hour for a walk or to watch a movie before going to bed. When I have to work the whole day, I need to do something which makes the day a good day before going to bed. I also try to stop hoping for something to arrive soon. When I finish my master’s degree, I will have more money to spend, so my life will be more comfortable. But I don’t want one year of my life to pass fast so that this day arrives sooner. I want to enjoy my studies, learn a lot, make friends, get better at bouldering, and eat delicious food.
I hope that you get what I am trying to say. If you are always waiting for something to arrive, I am asking myself if you are living at that moment. If you have too much work to do to take an hour to eat something you like or to go for a walk, then maybe that’s a sign that you need to change something. Unless you want to wait until you are older, maybe even until you are retired, to enjoy your life. So, when the weather is bad and you can’t go to the lake as planned, why don’t you read that book you still have on your shelf or watch that movie you were waiting to see? When Covid-19 prevents you from going out and seeing your friends, which for sure is pretty annoying, maybe you could use that time for yourself. Start doing sport or go for a hike and see the nature which surrounds you. Spend more time with your partner and enjoy the time together, which is only possible thanks to home-office. The best thing is that if you start enjoying every day, the days will automatically pass faster, so the holidays arrive sooner. That’s because when you are happy, it feels as if time passes faster. But then the days were at least worth it.
I hope that you are all healthy and that you enjoy your day! If you are also writing your exams, I wish you good luck. If you are having a bad time at work or personal problems, don’t lose faith and try to enjoy small things.
do you remember my post about the first two chapters of the audiobook „Take Control of your Life“ by Mel Robbins? If not, you might want to read it before continuing with this post. However, after finishing my first post, I talked some more about these topics with my best friend Julia. She persuaded me to write another post about this topic as there are some more things to say.
In the other post, I talked about how your body reacts to stressful situations before that feeling of stress gets to your brain. Body reactions are different for everyone. When I feel stressed, for example, right before a presentation, I experience a fast heartbeat, I start to feel dizzy, my throat gets tight and my mouth dry. I always want to drink endless water to avoid having problems to speak because of my dry mouth. At the same time, I am scared that I will have to go to the toilet while presenting due to drinking so much water. That could distract me and make me forget what I wanted to say. Very tricky, as you see. In the first post, I told you that since I listened to the audiobook, I tried to realize how my body reacts to stress. That enables me to try to calm down directly when I feel the signs. Here breathing deeply or going for a walk helps me to slow down. But of course, don’t go for a walk when you are supposed to hold a presentation. Mel mentioned one more interesting thing concerning this topic, which I wanted to share with you. She said that the body not only feels stress first but that the reaction to stress is also linked to a very primal reaction. As a reaction to stress, the body starts to produce chemicals to be ready to react to the „situation of danger“ you might be in. Your body doesn’t know if you are stressed about something harmless, or because you are being attacked by something/someone. The thing is, the chemicals are only produced for 90 seconds. So if after 90 seconds there was still no attack, your body stops feeling stressed and the chemicals disappear. That means that if you still feel stressed or anxious after 90 seconds, you decided to stay like that. In my opinion, that’s very interesting, as it means that we can actively decide if we want to feel stressed or not. And as you surely know, feeling stressed or anxious isn’t a good feeling. So why should we decide to continue feeling like that?
You see where that’s going. Feeling stressed, only makes us feel bad and doesn’t help us to escape a stressful situation or to solve our problems. It doesn’t make us more productive or thoughtful. So why don’t we just stop doing that? I certainly will try it! If you want to try it too, firstly you will have to find out how your body reacts in a stressful situation. Then you can start actively stopping that reaction. Mel said that you can, for example, simply count to 90, so you know when the feeling will be over. Or you can use the 90 seconds to do something that calms you, like doing some stretching exercises. Or maybe you sing your favorite song? I know that must sound impossible for you, but I can tell you that I haven’t felt stressed for a while. Although I have so much work to do at university, some projects I want to work on, plus this blog, I didn’t feel stressed once. Even when my best friend spent a weekend at my apartment, so I didn’t do any of my homework, I stayed calm. When I realize, that I am about to speed up and get the feeling that I have so much to do, „when should I do everything?“, I breathe deeply and remember that these thoughts won’t help. I will just work hard and keep going. What I am trying to tell you is that you should stop panicking when you have too much work to do or when you face a problem, as it doesn’t help. Actively stay calm and get your work done. Doing something is the best way of solving your problems and getting your work done on time.
Another thing Mel explained, is that there are fixed and growth mindsets. A fixed mindset means that you don’t think that it is possible to change. People with fixed mindsets are excusing behaviors with the explanation that that’s simply who they are. It’s not their fault. That remembered me of my dad once telling me that at his age you can’t change anymore, as your character is fixed. That would be a fixed mindset I guess. Why shouldn’t it be possible to change our behavior when we get older even if we wanted to? Maybe it gets more difficult as you have been behaving the same for so long, but if you want to change, I believe that you can do it. My mother, for example, changed very much in the last few months and is doing very well. Also, Mel explained that people with fixed mindsets tend to say that trying something new is likely to fail. You can only achieve something if you are talented. People with fixed mindsets are those who always tell you when you have a new idea that it’s not that good or too risky. The thing is, they don’t believe that achievements result from working hard but from being talented. It’s the same as my dad talking about his fixed character. They think that you are who you are. What you can do depends on who you are. I reflected on that topic and I must admit that I sometimes thought like that too. For example, I asked myself if I could become a consultant based on my talent. I tried to find the perfect job for me while trying to find out in which areas I am talented in. Well, that’s pretty much a fixed mindset.
A growth mindset means that achievements depend on work. Therefore, anything is possible if you work hard enough. The funny thing is that I think that I have that mindset too. I studied International Management as a double degree, spending two years in France. When they send me to Reims in 2015 to start the study program there (you can start either in Germany or in France depending on your language skills), I wasn’t very good at French. I don’t know why they chose to send me directly to Reims. But even if I hardly spoke French at that time, I never asked myself if I will fail. I was just so happy to be given the chance to study abroad and to learn more about a new culture. I didn’t think twice before leaving my home to discover „la région du champagne“. And well, even if for months my discussions were based on movies that I have watched, after two years I was able to speak french fluently. Moreover, I left France with A as an overall average mark. Now I am studying logistics, as you may have seen on my website. Here I also asked myself if I am talented enough to do it (fixed mindset). Then I thought that I don’t know, but that I am very passionate about logistics, so I will try and find out. Whatever happens, if I just work hard enough, I could do it. Therefore, I think that it is possible to have both a fixed and growth mindset. Or maybe I am switching between both of them. The thing is, who cares if I am „talented“? What does that even mean? I realized that I should stop spending my time reflecting on what I am good at to decide what I should do. I should rather reflect on what I am energized by. What are things that inspire and motivate me? Well, these are the things I should invest my time in and just work hard to be good at. If I am interested in something, but I have no idea about it, I shouldn’t stop myself from doing it but rather start getting to know more about it! Yes, it is easier to do something in which I am good at. But it isn’t necessarily the thing which makes me happy. Before I started to study in France, I knew nothing about economies neither was my French very good. When I started bouldering, I knew nothing about it. Before starting my master’s degree in logistics I only attended some classes, so I wasn’t very good either. I hope you get what I am trying to tell you. If you want to do something, it doesn’t matter if you are good at it now, it’s the work you put into it that makes the difference.
The last thing I wanted to tell you, is what Mel Robbins said about beating oneself up. It happens more often than one might think that people beat themselves up for something they did. For example, when I made a mistake at work, I felt very very bad about it. Even if it was just a mistake in an E-Mail I wrote. I was angry with myself for making such a mistake and for not paying enough attention. Well, you know what? Everybody makes mistakes. Beating yourself up afterwards doesn’t make it any better. You will just feel worse and stressed out. If you are one of those people and you want to be happier and less stressed, maybe you should stop doing that. I certainly am trying. Here it helps to think about something you achieved or something that makes you happy. When you do make a mistake, try to stay calm and think about that exact moment. It could help to think „Fuck it, it doesn’t matter. It isn’t the end of the world.“ You should learn from your mistakes, but you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself.
I hope this post gave you some more insights on how to be less stressed, how to get started, and how to be happier. If you enjoyed this post, I am happy about a comment or a like. Also, if you want to be notified about new posts, just enter your email address on the rights side of this post and click on subscribe. Otherwise, you can follow me on Instagram.
I have a question: do you have a best friend? I mean a real best friend who knows you the best and for whom you would do anything. You know until recently I have never really thought about this, but some people don’t have one. I realized that whenmy best friend once came to my house late in the night although she had to work early the next morning. That night my relationship ended after almost three years. I can tell you that I wasn’t in a good mood and I just didn’t want to be alone. So she came after 11 pm to be there for me. She told me then that when she had said to her boyfriend that she has to go to see me, he answered that he understands even if he can’t understand because he doesn’t have a best friend like that. There is nobody he would do such a thing for. Not a friend anyway. That’s when I started thinking about how life would look like if I didn’t have her. This is pretty unimaginable for me, as we have been best friends for 14 years now. She is my family and she means the world to me. That’s why I decided to dedicate this post to her, as she deserves it for supporting me for all those years.
We first met in September 2006 on the first day of school. In Germany you have the elementary school which lasts for four years, then you have either the „Hauptschule“ which lasts for five years, the „Realschule“ which lasts for six years and the „Gymnasium“ which lasts for 8 years. The last school I mentioned gives you the possibility to study after finishing high school. I went to a Gymnasium near Stuttgart where you can mature in arts or science. I love the arts, that’s why I chose this school. So when it was the first day of school, I decided that I wanted to make new friends. So little Eileen sat on a table where nobody sat and hoped that children she didn’t know would sit next to her. That’s when three children from my elementary school came to sit next to me. Wow, that plan worked well. But then there was the moment which changed my whole life: the teachers told us that they would go out for five minutes, so we could change our places and decide where we want to sit for the rest of the year. I have no idea why they decided to do it, but it was my chance. So when they went out, I jumped up and looked for a place to sit. And there it was, a row where only one place was left as there were already two boys and a girl sitting. If I sat there my old friends couldn’t come to sit next to me as there was only one place left. So I went there, looked down at the girl, which had long brown hair and brown eyes. I asked: „Is this place still free?“ She looked up and said: „yes“. And that, guys, was the moment Julia and I became best friends. I will never forget that moment as it changed everything. Also, I can tell you that my old friends weren’t very amused about my choice to sit next to new people so these friendships didn’t last very much longer.
Julia also told me her side of the story. She sat next to the only children she already knew, which were two boys from her old school. She wasn’t very happy looking forward to sitting next to two boys for the rest of the year. She was too shy back then to sit next to somebody she didn’t know. Then a blond girl suddenly stood next to her and asked: „Is this place still free?“. Well as you already know from above that girl was me. The funny thing is that we both remember this moment as the start of our friendship. We just don’t remember what happened afterwards and how we became friends. We just remember being friends ever since.
Having a best friend changes your life. For example, it’s harder for me to make new friends. We are so close, that it is difficult to feel the same about other people. I do have other really good friends, but not many. I am used to having only a small group of very good friends. Before I met Julia, I was used to having a larger group of friends so that changed. The reason why is that when you know somebody that well you extremely enjoy the time together. Spending time with people you don’t know that well will automatically be less fun, so I rather spend my time with her and other close friends of mine. I don’t know if you can relate to these feelings or not. Everybody is different so everybody experiences friendships in different ways.
The thing which is the most outstanding is the feelings I have for this girl. She is not only my best friend but more like a sister. My soulmate. I know this post may be very schmaltzy, like a romance novel, but it is like a love story, just not in a sexual way. And you know what? Even we had a moment where we were distancing ourselves and not talking for almost one year. That was in 2014, right after finishing our high school diploma. We just started arguing and being annoyed without any reason. We didn’t talk to each other until I send her a message for Christmas that year. Maybe it was puberty. Today we are closer than ever. I always say that we are so alike as we have grown up together. If you met us, you might think otherwise. She is calm whereas I am more turned up. We have different jobs and different lifestyles. But we have similar thoughts, we understand each other without words and can talk endlessly, even about nothing.
There is one last thing that’s interesting about friendships. I once read that if you have been friends for more than 7 years, the chance that you stay friends forever is very high. I hope that’s true and not just a saying, because then Julia and I, it really means forever.
So I would find it very interesting to know if you have a best friend. Just fill out the survey below if you want to know about other people and their friendships too.
Love, Eileen
Survey about Best Friends
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